The Infinite Pride Calendar

It's always Pride O'Clock somewhere.

A purity spiral is taking over the entire calendar:

In 1971 it was Gay Pride Day.

By the mid-1990s it was Gay and Lesbian Pride Week.

By the turn of the millennium it began to be called Pride Month — now for much more than gays, and for many more days.

By 2022 the Canadian government had officially declared all of summer, from June to September, “Pride Season.”

In Canada, “summer” is now called “Pride.”

But why stop there?

Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion busybodies have decided to extend the season yet again, through the end of October. This year, they’re heavily pushing October as 2SLGBTQ[Q]IA+ History Month.

This will jussst about get queer people safely to the end of the second week of November, which is the start of Transgender Awareness Week (Nov. 13 - Nov. 19). And the day after that is of course the hallowed Transgender Day of Remembrance (Nov. 20).

In case you’re worried about that two-week prideless interlude after the end of October during which people have the nerve to memorialize World War I soldiers instead of the real heroes — the Rainbow People — there’s Intersex Remembrance Day on November 8th.

This November marks a time to remember the real fallen heroes: Intersex people.

However, many believe that’s still not enough queer remembrance for November, so there’s an active campaign to ensure the whole month of November is celebrated as Trans Awareness Month, spearheaded by (where else) the City of San Francisco.

San Francisco City Hall is lit up in pink and blue each November to celebrate Trans Awareness Month, which was invented there.

But what about earlier in the year? For those who can’t wait until the season formerly known as “summer” kicks off to express their pride, on May 17th we’ve got the International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, and Transphobia (formerly known as “IDAHO,” the International Day Against Homophobia, and which will no doubt soon be renamed again to erase any mention of homosexuals, or to at least relegate them to the end of the list instead of the start).

And if that’s not early enough in the year for you, there’s International Asexuality Day on April 6th.

Wear a black ring on your middle finger on April 6th for Asexuality Day!

Next year you won’t even have to wait until April, because Sunday March 31st will mark the holiest and most important day of the year: Trans Visibility Day, otherwise known to the unenlightened cisheteronormative folk as Easter.

Easter is now Trans Visibility Day

Oh! Speaking of Jesus: south of the Equator, Mardi Gras has already become Australia’s gay pride celebration season.

The Sydney Opera House marks the beginning of Lent

And back up here, the sick cishet display known as “Valentine’s Day” gets some much-needed counterprogramming with Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week, for the seven days following February 14th. It’s symbolized by a heart striped in the colours of bile. That’ll show ‘em!

Aromantics have aptly chosen as their symbol a heart striped in the colours of bile.

What’s left?

Pride started out as a single day near the end of June, but lately it has stretched all the way forward to the end of November, and all the way back to the beginning of February. There’s just the wintry depths of December and January left in the calendar for the unberainbowed holdouts.

Christmas, New Year’s, and in the U.S., Martin Luther King Jr. Day, remain shamefully unqueer.

But I’m sure GLAAD and Justin Trudeau will team up and make a plan to fix those holidays, too. For one thing, the “+” doesn’t even have a single day yet, let alone a week or a month!

Here, for free, are some suggestions:

Instead of shortening Christmas to “xmas” in your emails and texts, write it as “+mas” (pronounced “plus-mas”) instead, as a way to remind everyone of your virtue and inclusiveness.

Then ring in the new year with New Year’s Resolution to End All Queerphobias Eve.

And finally, leading up to Martin Luther King Jr. Day, celebrate All Kings & Kweens Matter Week.

(This post was originally posted, slightly modified, at Butterflies & Wheels.)

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